Hi, I'm looking for mature answers. I'm 19 years old and I have only had one sexual partner, my fiance. I don't know what an orgasm is and I am convinced that the majority of women are like me, although my fiance, who is much more experienced than I am, believes otherwise. He is very frustrated because I have not orgasmed once ever since we started having sex. I really don't want to think that there is something wrong with me. Are the majority of women really like me? I keep telling him it doesn't matter but he makes a very big deal out of it. I'm very confused and don't know how to explain things. Please help me get a concensus on this!
When I was around your age, I never had the big O either… very frustrating too, because I kept thinking there was something wrong with me. It sounds like your fiance's trying to imply that too… I got the same advice you did, get to know what feels good to you, etc., but I already knew what worked for me and I couldn't get it to happen with my fiance.
I didn't have that problem so much when I got older, so in retrospect, I think it was due to the fact that at that age I was just so damn nervous about having sex that I couldn't get fully into it. It isn't that I wasn't enjoying it, but you know, you have these expectations to deal with, and if you feel like you have to have the big O or he will be disappointed… that's not helping! So tell your fiance to ease up on the pressure about the big O. Unlike guys, it doesn't have to happen every single time for a woman anyway!
I'd say the most important thing about having sex is to ask, does it feel good, are you enjoying it? Tell him to concentrate on that instead!
June 9th, 2007 at 9:24 pm
I believe MOST women know and have experienced orgasms.
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June 9th, 2007 at 9:24 pm
The sad truth is your very hard to stimulate and he just cant do the job lol…
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June 9th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
You are right that many women don't orgasm via intercourse but wrong that many women don't orgasm. You need to explore your own body to find out what makes you orgasm when you are alone so you can show or tell your boyfriend how to bring you to orgasm. Once you he knows how to bring you to orgasm then it is his responsibility to either manually or orally bring you to orgasm after intercourse.
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June 9th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
Not all women have orgasms. In fact some women will never achieve an orgasm. Here is the trick to find out if you can orgasm, pleasure yourself. If you can achieve an orgasm then, then all you have to do is inform your fiance on how to do it and that should work. If all else fails fake it.
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June 9th, 2007 at 9:29 pm
i dont remember the exact statistic, but the majority of women have problems with reaching climax… i heard that a womans body has to learn how to have an orgasm and it takes time… also most woman can't orgasm with vaginal sttimulation alone, they need to be stimulated by the clitorus… also if you stress about it you are less likely to reach orgasm… just relax… it will come with time…
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June 9th, 2007 at 9:30 pm
tell him to take it slow and easy. do lots of foreplay and be used his imagination.
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June 9th, 2007 at 9:44 pm
You need to work out on your own body what it takes to get u there. Its your body, you should know how to do it yourself before expecting anyone else to work it out!
Him being frustrated that he hasnt managed it will put pressure on you, which cant be helping you relax! Dont worry about it and its more likely to happen
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June 9th, 2007 at 10:16 pm
When I was around your age, I never had the big O either… very frustrating too, because I kept thinking there was something wrong with me. It sounds like your fiance's trying to imply that too… I got the same advice you did, get to know what feels good to you, etc., but I already knew what worked for me and I couldn't get it to happen with my fiance.
I didn't have that problem so much when I got older, so in retrospect, I think it was due to the fact that at that age I was just so damn nervous about having sex that I couldn't get fully into it. It isn't that I wasn't enjoying it, but you know, you have these expectations to deal with, and if you feel like you have to have the big O or he will be disappointed… that's not helping! So tell your fiance to ease up on the pressure about the big O. Unlike guys, it doesn't have to happen every single time for a woman anyway!
I'd say the most important thing about having sex is to ask, does it feel good, are you enjoying it? Tell him to concentrate on that instead!
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June 9th, 2007 at 10:20 pm
Sorry, I don't think your Fiance is good enough… Tell him to go harder and faster? You'll know what it is when you have one…
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June 9th, 2007 at 11:37 pm
Maybe he is not doing something right or its very hard for you to orgasm..?? I guess you wont know unless or until you are with other partners. I think it would really suck to get married and not ever orgasm through your marrage. Sex isnt everything but it is a giant part of relationships. Good luck
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June 12th, 2007 at 9:47 am
Viagra is for male erectile dysfunction, and Diva is for female orgasm dysfunction.
Link to diva here
http://www.getdivapills.com
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